I am forbidden from the outside world. The outside world has air that is cooler and flows over my body, there is warmth from above that I usually only know when I lie by the glass on the tall floors, bathing in the light and heat. I know I am not allowed to go to the outside world as my humans become distraught. I have been to the outside world a few times, with slim opportunity, when the glass has been left open and the outside air flows through. The smells outside are so many, and I sense them in all their variances and multitude, there are so many more out there that I do not know, that I know I could find. It is also scary out there. When the humans have seen me, I hear them shout and my body aches. One of them spoke calmly, once, when I was on the green floor, the texture like the soft surfaces, but deeper, colder, gritty, smellier, always smellier, but I knew I had to go back. I rushed as they opened the big glass and went back into home. Home is warm and I have many places in my home where I like to lie. The outside is so tempting, but why does it scare? I have seen the outside from the small moving room, when they trap me, when they take me to that other place, with the sterility and sharp edges, but my favourite human is still there. There are bad ones, but he is there and I only like it when he holds me. What tempts me is also what is scary. My nose is underestimated; I am very sensitive to all the smells. I remember all of them and I know all the differences. I don’t know if I would stay and explore the outside if the humans didn’t come, and I didn’t see them, and I didn’t know that I had to go back. But I always run back and I know I must. I go to my favourite place. I change my places when I get bored, but I like the one on the big human sitting place, at least right now. I like it when the humans aren’t there and it has space, and it is soft. Being soft is what makes the places best. I have a few of them. I like the long human sitting place, but only when the humans aren’t there. And I also like the big human lying place. They lie in it at night. But I only like it when I can lie on it alone. Or when my favourite human lies on it, in the day. I know he’s resting and not sleeping, as he moves and he likes to hold me, and play with me.

He has his own place where he sleeps, but I only like to lie by his feet when he rests, not when he sleeps. I like the bigger lying place because when he lies there, I can be near him, but I can also run and flee, because I need the open. I always need an escape. I can’t be shut in the rooms and trapped. I am happy when the walls are open and I can go through all the rooms, but I have smaller places I can hide, if I must. I also have my soft and crinkly surface on my favourite human’s sitting place, and the place under the small floor, but I like that sitting place most. When my human sleeps, I can be near him and watch him. I follow him around the home and I like being in the rooms with him, and he is here most of the time. When he isn’t, and he goes to the outside world, he makes the home smaller by closing the walls, so I can’t go to the metal drip and drink the water, or climb on the higher floors. But when he is here, he doesn’t seem to mind and he doesn’t close the walls. I like his smells, but not the others. Some of the other humans are here most of the time, and some are different and occasional, and sometimes there are ones I have not seen again. But I don’t like to be close to them. Their sounds are different, and I feel like I must move fast when they are there, and I don’t know if they will harm me, I don’t want them to touch me, but they sometimes try. They make sounds to each other, like I do for them. I make sounds so my favourite human knows I want him. I can be sitting in one of my places and I see him, and I must let him know. The sounds the humans make are louder and strange. I know they are not for me. They speak at each other and speak coarsely, and I don’t know what they mean, because they don’t want to be touched or they don’t want food. They are always moving and doing things I can’t fathom. My favourite always knows when I want food, when I make sounds for food, he can sense me and always seems to do it when I want, and only ignores me sometimes. There isn’t a pattern, or there is to some things, but others are unknowable. The human sounds are so strange because they don’t always do them, and I don’t know why they make them. They don’t make food for each other after the sounds, or they don’t touch each other, and they go on as if they made no sounds, and it looks very silly when making sounds produces the same thing as being quiet. Quiet is good and most of the day is quiet. I can hear the outside world sounds but they are muffled, unless the glass is open. I can go between all my places and sit, or lie down and sleep. The worst noise is from one of the machine objects. They have machines in the different floors in the rooms but one of the machines comes out and they move it around. It vibrates and hums, it makes a raucous howl, and I have to escape to hide in one of the higher rooms or under things; the machine feels like it could grab me, so I don’t go close.

Then it goes away, but I don’t know where it goes. The humans just have it sometimes, but not for long. I know it is a machine as I smell no blood, no skin or hair, it is a human creation. My favourite human makes sounds for me, I know the sound he does when he wants me, or when he is back from outside, so I always rush to see. When I rest and sit, I can think. I think of concepts, and how things move, I conserve, I think about all the smells I have sensed that day, or all the things in the home that change. Sometimes there are flying creatures, small ones, and I know I can catch them. When I do I can play with them, and then eat them, but playing with them first is better. Sometimes the flying creatures are there but go away very quickly, and they are too high for me to get them, I see them at the top, so I go somewhere else to sit, or wander around the home. The home has many smells, sometimes the air has a hint, like it sprays, but then it disperses, and soon it isn’t acute.

Some smells are acute and are always there, and stay in the same places, the humans have smells that come and go with them, and they smell the most of different things. And their skin changes. I like to lick the skin of my favourite. He has salt in his skin and his long fingers, but the skin can change and he has different colours, soft ones, that go over the pale skin. But he always has salt, and I can sense the other humans have less, though I wouldn’t lick them anyway.

There are things the humans do that seem wrong, like they know they didn’t want to do something, but they did it anyway, and make a sound like they are angry, and I don’t know why they moved like they did, all clumsily and in error. I sometimes misstep when I move, but they do it much more, and they don’t use their front legs to walk or run, they stand only on the back legs and look tall, like I do when I want to climb, but they look like that all the time when they move. I don’t make so many mistakes, and neither does the dog creature. I haven’t even mentioned him, I ignore him mostly, but he’s always here too, quiet, he makes loud shouts and howls when he goes to the outside world with the humans, and he always comes back, and I sense his caution when I go near him. He doesn’t go near me, or make sounds at me. I even swipe at him, and he is meagre and wimpy, and skulks away in cowardice. But he lies down in his place most of the day. When he moves, he moves like me, fast, though not with grace, and I know he’s not like me. The last time I was with others like me was when I was smaller. The ones with the same smells and fur, and claws, and the same sounds. There were lots of them, Mother, others, licking and biting and clawing, and the wrinkly human on her own, and then I was taken in the small moving room to the rooms with the tall glass, with levels and a tray with small rocks, with soft things, on my own, before my favourite human came. When I first saw him, he was calm, delicate, I didn’t mind being near him, I didn’t feel like running.