11.30am: a Google mapping van passes me outside the car park on my post round and because it has long been an ambition of mine to appear on Google Street View I thought I’d make some notes about this important day:

1. At 5am I had my usual breakfast of Sainsbury’s muesli with no added salt or sugar (the one in the blue bag) with plenty of milk and a spoonful of honey.
2. It was a good day for birds on Springfield Lane. I saw a song thrush, a dunnock, a Robin and a jackdaw.
3. I chatted for a while with Mr Turner at Kirkburton Autocraft. He told me to keep smiling.
4. At the entrance to the flats a couple were discussing the pros and cons of renting property and whether or not having a bath as well as a shower might be a deal breaker.
5. Today’s earworm is “King of Pain” by The Police. As with most earworms, I’ve no idea why.
6. My bundles of mail are heavy today. I’ve got a lot of chunky Yorkshire Garden Centres door-to-door items with a photograph of colourful peonies on the cover. I’ll be holding these in my Google Street View portrait.
7. The first pieces of litter I saw after being past by the Google van were a Vimto can and a McFlurry cup.
8. The first car to pass me was a Fiat 500.
9. It’s been wet and muddy over the last few weeks but in recent days the sun has come out and the mud on the pavements has turned to dust.
10. Someone has dropped an orange and black rubberised glove in the middle of the road at the entrance to the estate.
11. The heron down by the beck was nowhere to be seen today but I thought I’d mention it anyway.
12. I’m rushing around because I’m going to see Frankie Monroe tonight with Ivan from work. I’ll have to walk home because we’ve not had a car for over a month since the head gasket went on the old Peugeot. I’ve just realised I’ll have to walk to the theatre and back as well. I really do need to get a move on because I could do with getting my head down for an hour or two before I go out.
13. I had a couple of those oat bars that Molly recommended for my lunch, a peanut one and an apple and cinnamon one.
14. The man who stopped his Ford Focus to ask for directions to the bottling plant tells me that this is the best time of year to be a postman and I couldn’t help thinking “How the fuck do you know?”
15. In the end I only managed a half hour’s sleep before I went out. Frankie Monroe was excellent though. The few TV appearances there have been don’t do him justice. He’s a very skilful performer. Lots of very clever crowd work. My favourite section was his improvised sock puppet ventriloquism.
16. I walked 15 miles today.

At the time of going to press my dream of featuring on Google Street View has still not been realised. The site hasn’t been updated. I’m now wondering whether the van was just looking for somewhere to park.